Planning a wedding is always difficult, but that rating goes up when you are doing it for your granddaughter. Although there are the usual stresses and problems of any wedding, there are also issues of generational dissonance that need to be dealt with, where her tastes are dramatically different from yours. There are a number of issues to keep in mind, but some issues loom larger than others.
The biggest thing to remember is that it is her wedding, and not yours. This is going to be an exercise in listening, and one that you need to be doing most of the listening. She will no doubt want things done that you do not; as long as they are within the budget that you have agreed on, you should at least try to make them happen. This means listening to the music that she wants, the types of flower girl dresses she decides on, some of the colors that she wants, and some of the people that she wants. The goal is make her as happy as possible, to make her wedding day the best day of her life, no matter how much you may hate it.The other important thing is that you also get to play the diplomat. In making her wishes reality, you need to play buffer between all the assorted parties. This can be easy if you are not only doing the planning but taking care of the catering and other details as well, but there will always be diplomatic issues. And as long as you are playing diplomat, one area you should not overlook is how best maids are dressed; a common issue is that the bride wants to have the best dress and she is willing to sabotage her maids in order to do so. If you can do get them into good dresses, everyone will be happier in the long run.If you can survive the wedding, you may have a chance to do some bonding with your granddaughter, especially if the wedding goes off well. But remember that you can always back off or out; you are not required for the wedding to happen. This is an important item to remember, and do not forget it. If you need to sacrifice your relationship in order to make the wedding happen, then you need to sacrifice your position as planner instead. You are the grandma, and she needs to remember that you will be the grandmother even when the wedding is over. Otherwise, enjoy that time together and have fun planning a great wedding.